Forza- In other words strength. This is the word I have heard continuously throughout this year. Every time I was crying because I missed home, or every time I was just to lazy to get up... this word became a habit. It became a comforting thing. My host moms would say it to wake me up in the morning but they would also say it when I was crying and all I wanted was a hug and my real mom.
In this past week, this has been the word that I have been searching for. I am trying to grasp onto the concept that I have to be strong when leaving this place. Somehow, I have yet to find that strength. Tomorrow I board a plane at 9.35 am in Milan, Italy. At 12.30 pm, I will arrive in New York City, and by 7.52 pm central time, I will be back on home turf. Or what used to be home turf I suppose. This year I have gained another home and that makes coming back to my REAL home so much more complicated. I don't know where I belong... all I know is that I have people who love me and who I love so much all over this world and if home is where the heart is.... I have about 200 homes I would assume.
Going home will be a test of my strength, just like saying bye has been this entire week. I started my goodbyes about a month ago and they seem to be never ending, and every single one gets harder and harder. All I know is that no matter how hard this is, it is apart of this experience. It is this way to make me stronger and I am going to use it to better myself.
So that is basically it, I am leaving. There isn't much more to it. Wanna know how I am feeling? Hahahha good luck because I have no idea myself. However one thing I am sure of is that I have learned a lifetime of lessons in the course of 10 months. I'll make a short list because to write it all out would crash the internet.
So here we go...
Things I have learned in 10 months:
1) You CAN choose your family. Maybe you are forced into having one "real" family, but my family seems to have grown to an enormous size. No matter if we share the same DNA, every single person I have met this year has become family.
2) The world is SUCH a big and maybe sometimes scary, but always beautiful place. I though I would be stuck in Kansas my whole life, but once I got out I realized how fortunate we are as humans to live in such a diverse and amazing place. Now I want to see the whole world.
3) If you work hard, you can make anything possible. Just look at where I am at.... that is all the explanation you need.
I think these are the 3 biggest things I have learned in this experience, but definitely not the only. I will be writing more once I get home so for now I will stop and go enjoy the last day as a foreign exchange student in the country of Italy. Thank you for your constant support in my endeavors this past year and I will see you VERY shortly America.
Much love and so much thanks,
Kari Porter
